### Found

* 52 Crayola® colored pencils.
* My old wedding ring (size 5, as opposed to the one I’ve been wearing since I lost the old one, size 4.5).
* A picture from Annie and Nathan’s wedding.
* A picture of my mother, my grandmother, my daughter, and I.
* A batch of custom-printed Christmas cards from 2003.
* Christmas ornaments from the same.

### Discarded

* A dozen completely disintegrated highlighters from 1997.
* An action figure from _The Mummy_.
* A credit card offer from 2001.
* A calligraphy pen that a small person decided would make great dots on their art pad.
* A Sears card bill from 1998.

_Please note before freaking out: I am not pregnant._

I called out potential baby names as the kids and Matthew worked on tidying up their mess. “What about Victor? Or Heather, oh, wait, the cat is Heather.” (No offense intended, Heathers.)

“What would you like a little sister or brother to be named?”, asked Matthew.

“Princess or Volcano!”, piped up Rebecca.

Doomed. We are all doomed.